A central lesson of gravity is that local observables are ill-defined. Coordinates themselves are a redundancy of description, so any particular point in spacetime is only meaningful once defined relationally by clocks, rulers, or asymptotic data. Despite extensive formal work on this subject, explicit calculations of the resulting gravitationally dressed observables are more scarce. In this paper we perturbatively compute dressed matrix elements of local operators in electrodynamics and general relativity, including both potential and radiative photons and gravitons. Our expressions indicate that dressing is not ornamental: it universally induces kinematic singularities that can substantively reshape observables. We further show how dressing is mathematically equivalent to gauge fixing, as demonstrated by a dynamical temporal gauge in which the gauge-fixing vector is itself a geodesic fluid.